even this ocean fog
can't insulate me
from these sickening waves
of uncertainty
this threshold I must pass over

Always with change, there is this nagging feeling that comes over you all through the day, maybe six, seven times or more. It is this awful feeling of displacement, this sensation that the floor beneath you might not be there at any moment. Self-doubt, uncertainty, and fear about who I really am, what my true purpose is and how I will survive--all wrapped into one--but not at every moment of the day. There are also some very lucid moments of certainty, of confidence, of being propelled towards a greater purpose even without knowing exactly what that is--a belief in myself and the bigger picture, a surrendering to fate.

walking through
this thick morning fog
my hair curling
in all the wrong places
I surrender